Hiding in the Spotlight
What to write today?So many months have gone by, so many events transpired since I last write in this online journal. Alas, I have finally decided that it is time. Goodbye, blogger!
Surely I jest. :)
I'll write about my Practical Work Experience (admissions student worker) and courses in posts to come, but today I think I will simply write about stage freight. But one of a different sort.
See, this year I joined Earthen Vessels, PRBI's drama tour team. Of course, having spent the last several years in chapels at Sagitawa, I thought I had it all together. I thought I could objectify any persona to perfection, take on any face without it ever affecting me. With all my experience, I never thought I would be afraid of standing on stage ... but still I hid.
Acting demands emotion. When I step onstage, faking what emotions my character must portray is the last thing on my mind. No, I draw from what I have felt. I become the character. As a result, the stage becomes the one place where I can be completely vulnerable with people, displaying precisely how I think and feel without them ever picking up on my genuineness.
They all think I'm acting.
This year, God has been challenging me to be real with those around me. I have swallowed much fear of rejection by girls. I have gone evangelizing with groups of friends from the school quite a few times. And as I began to focus on the eternal rather than the immediate, drama for me became less of an opportunity to vent and more of a hobby.
I don't want to hide in the spotlight any longer.
1 Comments:
Derek!! It's good to see you back writing again!!
It is good to see what God had done in your life over the past several months. If you want to read a good book that deals with some of the stuff that God is teaching you check out "Your God is Too Safe" my Mark Buchanan. Here is a little bit of what this book is about.
"Here's a thoughtful, probing exploration of why Christians get stuck in the place of complacency, dryness, and tedium -- and how to move on to new levels of spiritual passion! Buchanan shows how the majority of Christians begin their spiritual journey with excitement and enthusiasm -- only to get bogged down in a "borderland" -- an in-between space beyond the "old life" but short of the abundant, adventurous existence promised by Jesus. Citing Jonah, he examines the problem of "borderland living" -- where doubt, disappointment, guilt, and wonderlessness keep people in a quagmire of mediocrity -- then offers solutions ... effective ways to get unstuck and move into a bold, unpredictable, exhilarating walk with Christ."
Anyways. I'll look forward to reading more from you in the future!
Post a Comment
<< Home